Recently, a couple in front of me at a concert started making out.
I know what you’re thinking, “Jon, you were probably at an R Kelly concert and everyone was making out.” Wrong.
I was at Jason Isbell and most people were listening to the music. As I often do, I thought about writing a tweet. (You should follow me on Twitter.) Here is the process I used:
1. Is it worth tweeting about? I only try to tweet about things that are unique, unusual, insightful or funny to me. Do I have some duds? Without a doubt. A lot of my tweets are garbage, but I am very deliberate about what I tweet about.
2. What is my angle going to be here? Am a frustrated that they are blocking my view of the concert with their amore? Am a bystander riffing on what appears to be a malt liquor fueled kiss fest? Am I offended by the PDA?
3. Alright, we’ll go with bystander riffing. What are the right words? Making out is a funnier term than kissing as far as I’m concerned but will cost me some characters. You kiss your grandmother on the cheek, make out only has one usage. I’ll drive up the awkwardness by mentioning that this is a crowded concert because it is.
4. What’s the best word to describe couples that do this? Is it “interesting” or “curious?” No, both of those make me sound creepy, like maybe I subscribe to “make out magazine” because I found that topic interesting. Gross. No, the right word is “confusing.” Couples that do that are confusing.
5. Should I do a call back and reference how much my wife hates public displays of affection? That might be a funny tie in but I’ve been tweeting about her a lot lately. I’ll leave Jenny out of this one.
6. How do I end the tweet? What’s a phrase people would never apply to a couple making out? “People group.” That’s the phrase. I’ll say they are a “confusing people group.” That’s funny to me because it makes it sound like couples who make out will be marching on Washington for better rights and protesting the taxes on chapstick.
7. Should I tweet it now or later? Is this best done as an “in the moment” tweet or does the timing not matter? The timing matters. I’m tweeting it now.
This is what I ended up with.
The whole process took me about 60 seconds.
Does that sound like a lot of thought for just one tweet? Sure, especially if you’re not using Twitter like I do to grow an audience I’m trying to serve with ideas.
But if you are using Twitter the same way I am, then be deliberate.